A Snowflake’s Guide to Not Being Offended


Has society slapped you in the face?

Do you find yourself lost in a world of protest hashtags?

Did your candidate flunk out of the Electoral College?

Are you bothered that a Muslim can be elected President in this day and age?

Can you believe what Madonna said?!

Then this article is for you!!

It’s easy to constantly be offended in today’s world. Recent studies have shown that being offended increases your risk of heart attack, stroke, and hypocritical intolerance.

These 12 steps are designed to help you prevent being offended.  Follow them closely and see the difference they can make in your life today!

  1. Stop taking yourself so serious. No one else really does.
  2. If you weren’t offended or even aware of the problem before you saw it trending on Twitter, then get over it! Can I get a #Kony2017
  3. Recognize that celebrities (although over-paid disproportionally by gender, apparently) also have a right to free speech. It’s just more annoying when they complain about stuff.
  4. Keep things in perspective. I survived 8 years of Obama, you will make it through Trump.
  5. For Christians: There is a reason we have a special term. So don’t act surprised when the world, acts like “the world”.
  6. Repeat after me – “There is a difference between being offended and simply disagreeing with someone.” Rinse and repeat as needed.
  7. Train your brain to ignore any breaking news alerts that include the hashtag #SCOTUS.
  8. Back away from the keyboard or keep scrolling.  Either one is a necessary response when you read a post that makes your “Oh no he didn’t!” flare up.  Reality is, no one is going to change their voter registration, or become un-gay because of your Facebook response.
  9. Accept the fact that “Privilege” is a real thing, and it comes in ALL the colors of the rainbow.
  10. Use the “Family Restroom” at Target.  It is usually cleaner, more spacious, and it’s a one-seater.  Problem solved.
  11. Unless you’re one of the 300k+ homeless veterans in this country, don’t get too worked up over the refugee “crisis”.
  12. Let go of your hostility toward the inanimate objects that hold our society hostage with their hate and violence. I.e. Flags, Guns, Chicken Mini’s, etc.

Work these 12 easy steps to take your life back. You deserve it!

*Results may vary